The Martian (2015)

Keep Him There

At one point in "The Martian", Matt Damon's character mentions that he hasn't bathed in quite a while. My wife turned to me and said, "He must stink!" I replied, "Almost as much as this movie."

I've seen worst movies to be sure. But I would have expected more from director Ridley Scott and certainly a great deal more from one of the better known planets in our solar system.

Damon plays astro-botanist and electromechanical whiz Mark Whatney. This guy makes McGyver look like a five-year-old dealing with an incomplete Tinker Toy set.

As far as the acting and directing go, I suspect that Mr. Scott, while screen testing Jessica Chastain, said something to the effect of, "Yes! That's it! That's the kind of acting I want in this film! I want everyone to simper and smirk and give me that "can-do" attitude. We'll do over two hours of just that! As well, we'll pepper the film with crummy pop music from the seventies. And we'll have none of that four-letter language that I've used in my superior films such as "American Gangster" (9/10). This is going to be a movie that the whole family can suffer through!"

The effects are great. And although I haven't been there yet, the Mars landscape looks real enough. But this is typically overblown Hollywood schmaltz (and you just KNOW how it's going to end).

I should finally mention another notable scene in this film where Damon is sitting in his Martian abode watching a video of a "Happy Days" episode. It raises the question, "Would I rather be 225 million kilometers away on a cold and barren planet watching "Happy Days", or subject myself to another movie like "The Martian" in the comfort of my living room?"

Tough call.

 Rating: 4/10